Wednesday, December 18, 2013
Movie Stars: December 2013
Before there were just "actors" there were actors and actresses. Before there were actors and actresses there were movie stars.
Peter O'Toole, one of those movie stars, died recently.
I was particularly saddened to hear about O'Toole's death. His remarkable portrayal of the enigmatic T.E. Lawrence remains one of my all time favorite performances.Even though it was 50 years ago, I remember vividly how I felt the first time I saw David Lean's masterpiece on the big screen in Boston.
"Man, am I thirsty!" I said to Ada.
Granted, this was not any kind of profound film criticism, but what do you expect after spending four hours in the desert?
I also remember being completely mesmerized by O'Toole's physical appearance. Those incredible pale blue eyes, made that much more striking because we viewed them against that white hot desert. And that hair! That full head of perfectly blond hair. I couldn't get enough of that hair.
I've seen the film at least a dozen times. On four of those occasions, I only watched O'Toole's hair. I watched his hair act. In my opinion, O'Toole's hair gave a better performance in that film than English actor Jack Hawkins, who played Lawrence's commanding officer. As a matter of fact, I would rate O'Toole's hair as the third best performance in the film, just behind those of O'Toole and Omar Sharif.
One man's opinion.
From all I've read, Peter O'Toole was an unapologetic scoundrel, a hard drinker, a womanizer, a gambler, in other words, a movie star. I don't know about you, but I give permission to my movie stars to be different kinds of people. I don't want my movie stars sitting around the kitchen table looking at health plan brochures. I want them driving recklessly, spending lavishly, and, if need be, dying young.
While I am happy O'Toole lived a long life, it wasn't for lack of trying.
It seems to me that in general our bright young modern actors are a bit too "corporate" to be called movie stars the way we called Marlon Brando, Anthony Quinn, or Robert Mitchum movie stars. Possibly Ryan Gosling has it in him to be a little James Dean-ish, and certainly poor Heath Ledger did, but I don't think of Matt Damon, Ben Affleck or Tom Cruise in that same way.
Of course not all of the old time movie stars were as wild and crazy as O'Toole. Jimmy Stewart was as All-American normal as you could get and Paul Newman spent most of his non-movie time in Westport, Connecticut doing what suburban people do (with the possible exception of racing cars).
It occurs to me I haven't mentioned any actresses in this piece. That might be because the only real bad female behavior that I know about these days comes from the Kardashian family and I just can't force myself to refer to any of that sad crew as actresses. I assume in the golden days of Hollywood there was more than enough bad behavior to go around (Judy Garland comes to mind), but the studios were more protective of their "property" in those days.
Among modern actresses I just don't see Jennifer Lawrence, Anne Hathaway, Keira Knightley, or Amy Adams going all O'Toole-Burton at a Hollywood bar, as lovely as that is to contemplate.
So requiescant in pace Peter O'Toole, you magnificent scoundrel. You are frozen in my memory bank standing atop that ruined Turkish train, with your blond hair and white robes flowing, your blue eyes blazing, waiting for David Lean to yell, "Cut," so you can begin another night's round of mayhem.
I hope they let you run a tab up there.
Ain't life grand?
J
Monday, December 16, 2013
Sarah's New Show: December 2013
I
was excited to learn recently that Sarah Palin, sweet darling of the
TeaPublicans, The Wasilla Wizard, The Fairbanks Fraud, will be hosting
yet another riveting television show. This one will be called "An Hour You'll Never Get Back" or
some such and will focus on Sarah's love of the great American
outdoors. Sarah, pictured above responding to the question, "Sarah, how
much sense do you have?" will bring her own peculiar vision to the great
environmental issues of the day.
I for one can't wait. Golly, it's appointment viewing for sure, you betcha.
Sarah's
first few shows will focus on her favorite public works project, The
Keystone Pipeline. In a bold stroke, Sarah, equipped with a helmet-cam,
is going to have herself inserted into the pipeline at its hub in
Hardisty, Alberta. In these early episodes, we'll follow sludgy Sarah
through the pipeline as she looks for leaks (quite a few) and extols the
virtues of this mammoth environmental disaster-in-waiting (What could
possibly go wrong?) Eventually, Sarah will plop out of the pipeline
somewhere near Port Arthur on the Texas Gulf Coast just in time for a
greasy lunch with her benefactors, The Koch brothers.
This thing is going to be bigger and better than Duck Dynasty.
In
another series of episodes we'll follow Sarah and First Dude Todd as
they raft, Huck and Jim-style, down the Mississippi River in search of
"the real America." While Sarah and Todd won't be able to find this real
America, they will be able to put their keen eyes on the Fox News
version of America as they weave an entertaining yarn about socialism,
death panels, and godlessness while trying to avoid barge traffic on the
river. It's going to be Lewis and Clark meet Hannity and Beck and I for
one can't wait.
The
last group of episodes will bring Sarah back, kicking and screaming, to
her native Alaska. Viewers will watch with rapt attention as Sarah
spends a few harrowing nights in a grizzly bear den (she breaks her
glasses), shoots salmon with a semi-automatic weapon, and, in a
brilliant season ending extravaganza, gets harnessed to a bald eagle and
soars over a number of exploding Exxon-Mobil oil rigs in the Bering
Sea.
Every
time we think we've seen and heard the last of The Seer of Seward's
Folly, she pops up again like a half-crushed cockroach. (I worked on
that simile for quite a while, thank you.)
Personally, I think she's had her 15 minutes and then some.
And that's 15 minutes we'll never get back.
Ain't life weird?
J
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